I often wonder about the things I do.
I start off passionate, wanting to try something new, to go all out in doing it, and later on reap the rewards and benefits gained from it. The toil; The hard work; The labour.
I often wonder whether these things are worth it. However, thoughts of these begin to cloud my mind only as the thing I started on drags by. Day after day, continuing on; pressing on, I strive forward, a flame alit, then reality hits.
How often do people give up? I have seen people so enthusiastic to do a community project. The proportions of time and energy put it clearly reflected that. They tried gathering people for this project, but became discouraged when the numbers where few, with more people quitting as time went by. They gave up, and the project was never completed.
I have seen people wanting to achieve something great. They manage to get people to participate in their activity; there was no problem in that. In fact, the numbers were really something. People were interested. Perhaps they had a similar dream? Perhaps they wanted to achieve something great together? But these people lacked talent. They lacked the ability to carry out such an activity. In the end, they thought there was no point in doing it if it wasn’t going to be spectacular.
It’s hard at times. I tend to give up after trying so hard.
But then it really depends. I mean, people give up for many reasons. Maybe they lost the passion they once had? Maybe they couldn’t continue on due to unforeseen circumstances? The reasons go on and on.
However, I have seen another kind of giving up, which really hinders one from trying to continue on. Others. Surrounding people. Especially when they’re involved in your dream. I guess like it or not, we all put expectations on people at times. But I digress.
What I am talking about here is not the kind where you stop trying on your own accord, but the kind where you stop trying because you are forced to do so, not due to inevitable situations, but due to people. More so those you are working with towards a dream.
In the end, while there are dreams you and I try to achieve on our own, there are also dreams which cannot be done in the same manner. Perhaps those dreams are too big, just too much for a single individual to handle. And when you are faced with incapable people, people who have attitude problems, people who just don’t have the same passion as you do, you are driven to a wall.
That feeling is one of total helplessness. One where you might just not be able to try anymore.
I guess at those moments, all you can do is try your best. Give it your all. And that’s it. That’s all you need really. Because, at the end of the day, you can only do what you can do. That’s what matters the most. While the activity on the whole may not have been successful, but you have tried until the very end. And honestly, that’s what it’s all about. Not trying till you succeed, but until you can no longer try.